Get matured and prepared before you get married to avoid unnecessary marital crisis that definitely leads to regret and gnashing of teeth!
Getting matured before getting married is a great way to avoiding any marital crisis, associated with or caused by immaturity. Though early marriage is good to somewhat, but the disadvantages associated with it are very many.
Every wise person will first make effort to know the right time to get married to avoid marital failure. Marriage is unlike any other ceremony that one can just enter it without first minding the guiding principles/rules for entering into such a ceremony without having a precise prior knowledge required. Study shows that success in marriage lies greatly on the new knowledge about the right time to get married-—as this always prevents one from entering into marriage in the Wrong time, which latter caused unimaginable marital headache.
Your journey to marriage is a venture which could easily be turned to adventure (exiting experience)—if you understand what it takes to make this happen; and what It takes to succeed the journey is seriously required to be made readily available before it’s embarked upon.
Therefore, you should be matured before making a decision to get married because marriage is a venture (as said above), which has potential to turn to adventure (exciting experience) when it’s fully prepared for. Thus, get matured to avoid becoming a source of problem to your dear partner, as marriage is not rosy when there is no financial maturity; It becomes destructible when there is no spiritual maturity; It becomes useless when there is no physical maturity; and it becomes a direct source of sin when there is no emotional maturity.
Is There A Specific Time To Get Married In The Scripture?
1To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: 2A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; 3A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; 4A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; 5A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; 6A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; 7A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; 8A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.
l am right here to tell you that there is no specific time stated or chosen in the Scripture that human beings should marry. And though, it has never been found anywhere in the Scripture where a particular time specifically stated or mentioned to get married, but all we know is that the Bible says and makes it clear to us that “there is a season for everything we do here on earth”–ecclesiastics 3; 1-8: there is a time to plant; there is a time to harvest; there is a time to gather; there is time to scatter, and so on!
The quoted verse above made it clear and understood that definitely there is an hidden (a time not clear or definite to us to get married) time planned by God for each and every one of us to marry in life, but which was not directly mentioned, and which has to be discovered by man. It’s this time I am really going to discuss with you here, as discovered from study, in a clear, concise and precise manner. l mean l am going to discuss the best, perfect and right time for you to really get married, as a youth who desires having marital happiness in life. Though there are marital crises and challenges, most of which do usually occur as a result of lack of knowledge and understanding about some things found very necessary to be put in place before ever attempting and deciding entering into marriage.
What Is Maturity In This Context?
The word “maturity” simply means full development in age.
But, l say here, in this context, that It’s beyond being developed only in age, but also in four major areas of life: spiritually, physically, financially and emotionally.
In this context,
- Is a proper and full development in all the four major areas of life of human beings; that’s, physical, spiritual, financial and emotional areas of life.
- It’s a stage at which one is maritally ripe to make a healthy, proper and effective decision to enter into marriage or to get married.
One of the foundation stones to be securely laid before getting married is the foundation stone of maturity. Let me now ask you this particular question: do you think you are mature enough now to get entangled in matrimonial responsibility? if yes, then that’s perfectly fine, but if no, you have a lot work to do before going into marriage.
Marriage is exciting when it’s fully prepared for!
Marriage Is Not An IMPROMPTU Ceremony; It Must Be Well Prepared For, And Time To Dive Into It Must Be Fully Discovered And Monitored
Marriage is not a child-play; it’s not for babies. It’s for those who are really matured in those for ways that I have mentioned earlier. Marriage is very exciting when those necessary things required to make it a success are readily provided and put in place before it’s entered into. It’s exciting when it’s fully prepared for. Therefore, before I proceed, you must understand that you don’t just enter into marriage just for the sake of getting married, or rather I say for the sake of having interest in it, or because you see some people around you getting married, or because most of your friends have all got married, no! But, you must only enter into marriage just because It’s right time for you to enter into it. You must only enter into marriage just because you have had everything required to be successful maritally. YOU MUST KNOW THAT MARRIAGE IS NOT JUST AN IMPROMPTU CEREMONY THAT YOU CAN JUST ENTER INTO WITHOUT BEING FULLY PREPARED AND UP TO THE TASK (YOU MUST BE MATURE). And before you say yes “l am ready and am up to the task”, you must have understood some things about marriage; you must have reached some stages of MATURITY. There are at least four basic stages of maturity (the stages I have briefly mentioned in the fourth paragraph above), which you must have been able to confidently say, “yes i am fully ready for the journey”. You must have been able to define life; that’s, to give clear meaning to life. Listen, l am not saying you must do some kinds of rehearsal before you get married, but l am factually telling you that there are some stages you must be found matured before finally deciding to enter into marriage. Why am I saying this? It’s because I am sure that, you, knowing and understanding these stages very clearly is a great way for you to get yourself familiar to every necessary things you are required to have before entering into marriage, and thus become fully prepared for the adventure. AS YOU HAVE TO REMOVE THE HUDDLES ON YOUR WAY BEFORE MOVING FORWARD IN LIFE, SO YOU MUST DO BEFORE ENTERING INTO IN MARRIAGE. Journey to marriage is an adventure, and what It takes to succeed is very required.
4 Stages To Getting Into Marriage: Indications Of The Perfect Time To Get Married
As said earlier in the above paragraph, I repeat: it’s without doubt confirmed that there are four major basic important stages of maturity, at which you must have been perfectly matured before deciding or deeming it a proper time to enter into marriage: these stages are ascribed as the ideal indication that it’s the right time for you to get married; they are what I describe as representing the real time a youth can say confidently in himself or herself that “he or she is completely matured to enter into marriage”.
Therefore, listed under here, these stages are clearly explained one after the other:
- Physical maturity—Before spreading and flapping your wing to fly into marriage, you must understand that you must be matured physically. Yes, you have to be ripe and up to the task; that’s, grown physically before deciding getting married because marriage is not for boys and girls who do not know the difference between black and white color. Noted by experts, divorce cases are more rampant in the marriage of those who are not old enough to get married than of those who are old enough. This implies that you ought to have had at least some ideas of what it takes to be a husband or wife before plunging into marriage. Early marriage has been noted to become a social problem in our nations so much that many voices are being raised against it today the world over. And, the fact here is that even if you are mature physically; that is, in age, this does not determines your maturity, which is absolutely true, meaning you have to be mature in three other stages before you can be truly declared “mature to marry“.
- Financial maturity—It’s unwise for you as a person to enter into marriage without a sure steady source of income. Being financially mature does not mean you must have thousands or millions of dollars in your Bank account before you get married, no, but to avoid financial crisis in marriage, youths are highly advised to make sure that they have at least a paying job—a job that ensures steady income. This is a raw fact that without financial maturity a woman or a man easily becomes useless in the home and family generally. Therefore, every woman, in order to avoid becoming liability to man in the home, needs a paying job, so also man, to avoid becoming useless and dishonored in the home before woman and children, needs a paying job that will be generating steady income for the family. As a lot of things call for finance, even after marriage, so two of you must think beyond wedding expenses if you will be successful maritaly.
- Emotional maturity—Emotional maturity, ability to understand, control and manage your emotions (feelings), has been confirmed to be one of the major stages of maturity needed of every marriage partner, especially man, in order to have a successful and healthy dealing with each other in marriage. Emotional maturity is your ability to control your emotions instead of letting your it defeat the better and best part of you. Being emotionally matured means you are able to check your emotions, to evaluate your partner’s emotional state and to bring the situation under control.
- Spiritual maturity—If you are not a Christian, you may not understand this very well, but it’s very important that you understand it because if only you are mature physically but a baby spiritually, then getting married may be dangerous for you. You may not accept this, but it’s a rare reality that you may not hear from marriage counseling experts. But, the fact here is that it’s sure that you have many battles to fight with the flesh, the world, and the Devil, so you must be very prepared in advance for this. You need to grow to some extent in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ and saviour and the word of God, the Bible. As a Christian, in order to make correct choice,.it’s necessary for young people to be basically mature. And it takes a lot of time to grow and develop in those areas enumerated above. In view of that, you Should not rush carelessly into choosing a life partner, so that you would not get into ill-prepared marriage.
Getting matured before getting married is a great way to avoid and overcome crisis caused by or associated with immaturity in marriage, be it financial immaturity, spiritual immaturity, physical immaturity or emotional immaturity. Though there is this belief that early marriage is good and advantageous, but it has great disadvantages when immaturity is involved. Those four stages of maturity discussed above are what every person who really wants to succeed maritally needs to have been matured before ever planning to enter into marriage. And finally, for any partner, either a man or a woman, to avoid becoming a liability or a useless person to each other, even especially to the children in the home and to the whole family, there must be full development;that’s, they must be fully matured in those four areas/stages of maturity discussed above. Marriage is exciting when it’s fully prepared for.